Preparing for a move... with ADHD

Today, in preparation for the move, and a month or so of being out of work, I decided to cut some spending in hopes of banking some loot.  I don't have many expenses, so this was proving to be rather difficult.  I suppose tanning is "unnecessary," but I always feel more in shape when I'm darker, and I look better in the bathroom mirror when I have my clothing optional daily dance hour.  I've also heard tanning isn't "healthy," although I'm not entirely sure I buy that.  At any rate, I started looking into alternatives.  I hate self tanners because of the munchkin-like orange hue and are as equally pricey as the tanning bed.  That's when I thought a pair of panty hose under a t-shirt might prevent my arms from having that translucent "twilight" glow.  As I was thinking of ways I could pull this off, I started reminiscing about the good ol' days when panty hose came in eggs.

My mom always got the panty hose in eggs, and I LOVED IT!  This should have been red flag number 613 for my parents.  I used to collect these oversized eggs and make a nest out of blankets, sit on them, and pretend to incubate them. I was always sad growing up because my eggs never hatched.
So all this talk got me thinking of chickens.  My neighbor has chickens, and sometimes I go over and pick some eggs from the hen house.  With exception to the gross fact of knowing the egg you are holding in your hand just exited a chicken's vajayjay and is now covered in feces, it's a rather gratifying experience.  It makes me feel so self-sustaining.  So I decided to go on craigslist and look for chickens for sale in Oregon.  I found several nice ones.  Rhode Island Reds, Black Sexlinks (wink), Leghorns, and more.  I was starting to get excited.  Then I found this ad....

Spring is just around the corner..Breeding Mount - $1500 (Medford)

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Date: 2013-01-14, 3:53PM PST

 

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If you are breeding and doing AI this mount is a must have. I have my stud and no longer need it.
These sell for $3000 new. Purchaser will have to dig the pole out (wink) and haul. Also have the Colorado AV
if wanted but buyer would have to purchase new liner as it hasn't been used for a while. Also have a stock
for examing and AI-ing for $400. Can have all three for $1750.
Picture is a likeness.

This got me even more excited than the chickens!  I've been concerned that there won't be much in the way of dating material in the middle of nowhere, so I think I just solved that problem.  Man, this day is so productive.  I totally forgot what I was talking about, but I'm gonna go take down my Match.com profile.